Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Take this u-scan and shove it.

This was originally posted on my myspace blog on October 4, 2005.
Pet peeve of the moment: U-scans, or more accurately, retarded people who can't figure out how to use them. I got off of work around 5ish today, and rather than fight traffic, I decided to go grocery shopping in good 'ol Downriver at the Meijer in Lincoln Park. I carefully selected my grapes and proceeded to the checkout. Now, I hate U-scans as a concept, because we the people are doing labor for these companies and not getting a discount for doing it. Do you remember bag boys (or girls... or should I have said bag people?)? Bottle return clerks? You know, the ones that you used to hand your empties to, and they would count them lickity split? Those "convenient" bottle return machines are just so much better, but I digress.
Anyhoo, I am in line behind a half dozen morbidly obese inbred fashion don'ts, and am patiently waiting for these people to figure out how to work these things. This is not nano-technology, people! You grab your item, scan it, and put it in the bag. Rinse. Repeat. Then this idiot cuts in front of me and asks me if this cart is taken. I tell him, "Yes, it's mine." "Oh, sorry. What about this one?" "I don't know. You know, there are a whole bunch of empty carts right there by the door that you just came in through." He gives me a dirty look. Then this inbred looking guy can't get his bridge card to scan properly. Come on! I just want to buy some damn grapes! Why does this have to be so hard? Technology is supposed to make life easier, right? Instead, we all work longer hours to pay for items to make our lives easier, while at the same time use said items to become more insulated and isolated than ever before. What happened? This is the downfall of civilization, babe. Historians in 4,000 years will say "What caused the decline of civilization in the 21st Century?" Their conclusive answer will be: U-scans and do it yourself bottle return machines.

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